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sept 12 2024; 12am

im not sick anymore!! and im goin back to classess. im in good spirits and ive caught up on most of my missing work, so im doin good. i even accidentally went ahead in my web design class lol.

but who cares about that. what i really wanna write about today is CAMPUS SQUIRRELS

so as an intro, ive always loved squirrels a lot. one of my fave animals. wonderful critters. and recently the past month or two ive been watching a lot of squirrel videos on youtube. mostly videos of feeding wild squirrels, but ill sometimes watch vids of domestic squirrels post-rehab. im pretty picky and ill only watch something and oogle at the squirrels if im confident the squirrel population isnt being harmed in any way or w/e. point is im a pretty big squirrel fan and ive been extra squirrelpilled lately.

so, w/ me being on a small(ish) uni campus we have a population of friendly fox squirrels. theyre very used to human activity and know that students will sometimes even feed them or at least leave behind food. base-level fear of humans is low.

so this has culminated in me buying a bag of almonds to carry around. partially to feed squirrels that i see, but also cause i need more protein & its just a good portable snack lol. the idea is if i walk by a wonderful squirrel and its not even running away from me, now i can reach into my bag and give it some healthy food that it likes!! and its cute its so cute. but also i tend to sit outside on the benches on campus a lot between my classes bc i dont wanna go back to my apartment. and ive found that this time is great for squirrel watching. so why not squirrel feeding too?!?

today (referring to the 11th) was basically the first day i did this. and dude. i got fucking hooked on squirrels. i was squirreling hardcore. i was the enjoyfulsquirrelwatcher.

i spent like 3 hours outside on the campus wandering around/sitting on benches and watching squirrels. i watched a long-term feud between two chipmunks. i heard many different squirrel and chipmunk noises. and i of course fed some squirrels.

i fed a total of three different squirrels today!! one in the morning and two later during my long squirreling session. they all had different personalities its really true.. the latter two i spent a great deal of time watching and interacting with. the first one, who i've been calling Almond or Sally (ill think of a decent name later lol) was the only female i saw today out of many many squirrels!! and i believe she is pregnant as well, or at least has some babies. her fur was also a bit thin in places, probably losing her summer coat. she was very calm, and even before i started interacting with her she was eating seeds in the same place for like 40 minutes. her movements were gentle but confident. she got a lot of almonds from me and would ask for more! she seemed to realize that the almonds i tossed were easier to find in the mulch than the grass so she would beg on the mulch lol.

the second squirrel, who ive been calling the alpha (he is undeserving of the title) chased away Almond a couple times. fox squirrels are very territorial!! initially, before i started interacting with either of them, he was fucking around in the tree above Almond and dangling eating seed pods and just generally being a goober. he came down the tree to scare away a third unknown squirrel that was harassing Almond. but then he also started harassing Almond LOL. anyway he has a very bright orange belly and tail, and very smooth fur. multiple times he sized me up, looking at me while standing on his hind legs, walking all around me (and under my bench), just really getting a good read on me. despite being above Almond in the pecking order and having a lot of energy, he was very flighty and got spooked easily. very curious about me but very cautious as well. when he asked me for more almonds he was much more direct, coming up to me faster & standing upright.

anyway. all that is to say that i hand fed both of these squirrels.

left: handfeeding Almond an almond.
right: handfeeding Alpha an almond. the crop is bad bc i was focused on the squirrel eating out of my hands.
bottom: offering an almond to Almond.

[do not fret, squirrels generally dont carry rabies and i sanitized after each time..] i handfed mr alpha twice even. it was so so sweet i felt their little paws and whiskers on my hand.... i got a ton of photos and videos. i had such a magical day.... i really want to keep doing this. i already feel like i have a connection with 2 individual squirrels....

im considering making a squirrelwatching page for my site where i can share pics and videos and stories and notes on individual squirrels..... cause literally that shit was so fun and i took so many pictures and vids that my phone died. and look at how much i wrote just now .. ya..

old

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sept 7 2024; 2am

so thursday was really difficult for me because i learned that UPS totally fucked me over.. i spent most of wednesday making my riptide buttons (which i was planning to hand out in person, obviously) and cleaning them all one-by-one (over 50!) and preparing the package to send them in/the shipping details. i couldnt just hand off the buttons to my travel buddies because i didn't take the train home. because i have covid. so i was gonna overnight mail them to the kalahari and they would arrive friday morning, and then my friends and teammates could hand them out for me! it was one of the few ways i could still participate in the event and it really helped me cope to come up with this plan.

the way im writing this doesnt make a lot of sense like how im structuring this story but i dont really care enough to clean it up this is basically like a journal and ive already told this story like 4 times at this point so. anywayy. i was really excited to get these buttons to riptide and at like 9pm when i finished getting it all together we dropped off the package at a UPS dropbox, yknow rather than wait until tomorrow when the UPS store is open to go in person. figured that would be faster, get the package to them asap, doesnt require me getting my friend with a car to do me any favors. Well,. apparently they dont check the dropbox very often. they only got to it like 20 hours later, and because they got to it so late, the shipping estimate gained a day. but uh oh, 2 day overnight shipping doesnt ship on saturdays for some reason! and of course no packages are delivered sunday. so my little love letter wouldnt arrive at sandusky until monday, when the event is over and none of my friends are still there.

i called and emailed UPS and to summarize, there was literally nothing i could do about it. i could not pay more for a better shipping plan, i could not even get the package back until monday. so i just had to cancel the shipment. and have a really, really bad day thursday.

it was just like.. i already had atrocious luck getting covid before riptide, and i was coping by finding these small ways i could participate anyway. and this felt like i had got the rug pulled from under me, AGAIN.. like i Couldnt Even Have This. like the world was out to freaking get me. but all in perspective, its really not a big deal.. im planning on sending my buttons out individually to my friends who want them, and ill save a lot of them for riptide next year + chishoals. its not like they will never get handed out. and ill still be getting my wonderful signed poster !!!! and in the grand scheme of things its pretty small potatos u know...... but ya that made for a really really hard night. im rly chilling now. although a little sad watching all the images and stories from riptide day 1 pour in.. but im happy for my friends and community (':

AND IM STILL SICK BUT ITS OK

sept 3 2024; 3:40pm

still testing positive today. only hope for still going is if i miraculously test neg tomorrow. and even then. and even then. and even then.. yea .

99% chance i dont go = 1% chance i can make it. WE LIKE THOSE ODDS

but ive been able to cope with it much better today. there are some things that can still happen even though i can't make it to the event in person.

so at every splatoon major lan the community has an official poster u can buy, and its tradition to get them signed like yearbooks. its really really fun. my poster from last year has a ton of signatures and its probably my fave poster ever.. so my plan is to pay my friends for a poster and have my teammates pass it around to sign. like how a kid gets their broken arm cast signed by the class. like im the make-a-wish squid....

also i made a bunch of buttons to hand out again like i did last year, including some buttons for my teammates of our pickup team logo. im planning to hand off these buttons to my travel friends, who will get them to my teammates, and then they can hand them out !!

so ya still really really sucks but im feeling much better thinking about my poster getting signed w/ well wishes n shit .. 🥹

Sept 2 2024, 8:30pm

well you know i was really looking forward to writing a blog post about riptide 2024. would be my second time going, as i went last year (my first splatoon lan! but i have since been to chishoals). ive been really really looking forward to riptide for the better part of a year now. my brother was even going to come with this time. all this past tense is probably making you nervous. well its true the worst has happened. mama tested positive for covid 2 days before leaving for riptide. despite masking every day. inside and outside. despite using hand sanitizer every time i return to my apartment. despite being like one of 3 people on the entire damn campus that still gives a shit about covid precautions. but god must like absurdist comedy as much as i do

its possible that tomorrow i feel completely fine and test negative. but i wouldnt feel really great about going just after recovering from covid anyway. i dont know. i likely wont even get that opportunity in the first place. i am so horridly devastated though and i want to go so bad. im so crushed im so heartbroken im so so so so devastated man. why me why now etc. what more can u even say about it. its just bad. im clinging to any possibility i can still go like im the man who invented a glue that lets him walk up the wall. sorry im just trying to cope LOL

i have a few things to be thankful for though. most importantly, i have a very mild case as far as i can tell. its mostly just been sore throat, worse appetite, a little nauseous sometimes. i dont have a cough at all which is great. im also grateful that my riptide pickup had 5 members, so me not being able to make it last second doesnt mean they have to drop at all. i would have felt REALLY bad if they couldnt play bc i got sick. another thing is my friends + brother that are still going will be able to get me stuff from the artist alley and get me the splat poster still.. maybe even pick up my custom badge 🥹..... and finally, i can remind myself ill be alright.... you know there will be more splatoon lans. more fun events with friends. its ok.

but um. yeah. very very likely im gonna not gonna make it to sandusky this weekend. and dont you worry this has already ruined my entire month. theres nothing more to say

here's an image from about 6 hours ago before i took my test, masked up outside. i have an urge to prove my innocence but my spite really makes no difference. its just sucks. sorry inkaritaville

Aug 28 2024; 11pm

guhhh ive been so needlessly stressed the past week or so. im doing fine like im getting to my classes & staying very organized and getting my work done.. i could stand to eat a bit more and be more consistent with brushing my teeth but ive been doing well. im still just super on edge and restless and having trouble relaxing though.. first week back at school after nearly a year and a lot of buildup and riptide in a week is definitely a lot of stress. im happy to be back at school and im of course excited and happy about riptide. but Ya its kind of a lot and im trying not to let it get to me too hard but ya..

aside from feeling like im constantly gritting my teeth and clenching my fists things have been going very well though. because of my chao hat (mentioned in previous blog post!) i made a friend in my english class immediately! ive just been referring to him as The Sonic Fan when i mention him lol. idk how good of friends we'll really end up being but its nice to have someone new to chat with its a little rare. i also have someone in my film class who i wanted to befriend a year ago before i left school & didnt get the chance to talk to.. i was really excited to see em & said hi. we had a very awkward convo & i could tell they were a little uncomfortable so i got out of there LOL buuuut im still happy to see a familiar face.

oh i also made cookies at like 2am that was fun. i hard committed to making a double batch and finishing it that night. i started around 11pm saturday and let me tell you. making a double batch chocolate chip cookies with no electric mixer is labor intensive. i was straight up mixing for 2 hours. it was worth it the cookies were very good and i was happy i finished them (:

yea the second batch that went into the oven i was really desperate to get the rest of my dough onto one pan so thats why that section of cookies is a bit crumbly. still tasted good. its the recipe my family always uses so it was a bit homey. we ate them all in like 5 days

well ya thats about it. hopefully my nerves will mellow tf out after riptide.. (yay riptide). and i will be sure to make a big blog post about riptide when im back!!!!!!

omg and i forgot. i started my web design class and my professor is a literal christian missionary. im just gonna get my standard web practices knowledge and GO....

Aug 18 2024; 3am

man i still havent cleaned up & made space for the blog yet. i probably wont publish an update until i get that going. unfooooortunately for me ive been recovering from ORAL SURGERY !! thats right mama got her cursed wisdom teeth out finally. and i didnt even say anything funny online or to my mom when i got off the gas! what a ripoff! i was a bit chatty & upset that i didnt get to countdown until i was put under but other than that i was very normal. i can check my texts from the time to prove it!

anyyyway. ive been recovering during basically everyones (including mine!) last week of summer in my hometown. so we've all been hanging out as much as poisssibleee but i was sickly and achey and swollen so i missed out on the last hoorah. thats ok though i probably needed a social break, we've been going pretty crazy this month (understandably so.. and i enjoyed it)

but yaaa in a few days i move back into my uni apartment. im still worried abt the semester and taking care of myself but i feel ive got a slightly better grip on it now. im gonna be able to handle it !!!!!!! ill be ok no matter what! & i got the support of a lot of close friends which i am very very grateful for. im looking forward to getting my routines in place back at school though, and im gonna take it eassyyyy. gona take it eeeaaasy. easyy. yaa

uhh heres my image of the week. or for the current entry i guess.

its a roblox screenshot from a new account i made where i was just listing off items in a random game & random children started joining in.
i did this, wjhere else, but at a culvers with aqua. where everything happens.
kayyy goodnight. actually i might poke around and stay up for another hour watching billy & mandy. we'll seeee

July 31 2024; 2am

tha school year approaches.. in a few weeks ill be taking classes for the first time since november o_o;.... im worried i wont be able to handle it but i have to go in with some confidence and optimism and accept that ill be ok no matter what etc.. but eep. at least the classes im registered for are fun. i finally got into the web design course at my uni so thatll def translate into site improvements.

right now im just chilling at home, no job, dealing with hypersomnia(??), talking to and hanging out with my friends as much as i can. i keep ending up at culvers. i love my friends a lot.

oh yeah and right before i go back to uni im getting my wisdom teeth out so thats gonna be great ..

what else what else..... idkkk ive just been trying my damnnest to chill out hardcore. kind of succeeding.

oh i should share an image or a video or smth for each blog entry. some kind of fackin file. yknow the deal with files. anyway

a snapback hat with embroidered eyes of a chao from sonic the hedgehog. its light blue with yellow brim and detailing the bottom side of the brim has art of dozens of chao printed

heres my new chao hat i got off ebay. im excited to make some buttons for it.. my hat collection grows stronger and more powerful n shit. dont worry my full collection will be on the site one day

signing off GOODNIGHT. ill iron out the details of what i wanna do with this blog section later. it'll have a designated page, probably

blah blah

pblansaduh aaknf pwqclwq.kj ptooey you sure did get really old~! wowww youre soo old now haha look at your rinkles *grabs you and ages you more

last edit
9/2/2024